The school bully experiences a severe lapse in judgment when he tries to sexually harass Mary.

Eric and Annie selfishly expect the kids to start the school year on routine so they can enjoy a lazy day alone together, but ill-prepared means in trouble. Nazi-style principal Russell has plenty of collaborating staff to enforce draconian discipline for 'gang and drug offenses' according to absurd new rules none saw coming, such as Simon's cutlery earning a suspension for 'concealed weapons'. Only Mary is happy with an ex-Olympic new basketball coach Koper, who meanwhile terrorizes Matt because of the beeper his father forgot when he borrowed Matt's jacket. Simon's buddy system only helps against a potential bully. Lucy makes her own life hell while Mary rudely fails to work in new guy Marcus, a natural flirt. The whole school buzzes about Lucy's classmate Peter McKinley's apparent suicide attempt. In fact Eric, called in by the police, discovers it's a desperate cry for help after 13 years of deaf tyranny from his insensitive, clueless single mother.

Simon get sort of addicted to golf, which causes trouble for him, Ruthie and various glass within their hitting reach. Matt and Lucy are fed up with Mary's adoration for coach Koper, whom they mistrust and dislike because of his condescending attitude towards English pupil Matt, who nevertheless does well on a James Joyce book-report. Mary sides with him when the siblings cry wolf over a hug but when she suddenly changes her tune after a shoulder massage, even the principal turns on Koper without any proof or actual incident. Eric hounds Lou, who insists the expenses for the nearly unattended Wednesday service can no longer be justified, to see the books. Annie finds $2,500 are missing but by the time the full truth gets known, both must side with 'thief' Lou and his secretly hard-tested family.

Matt tutors silver spoon James Potter in history, refuses to help him cheat but is still in trouble when the professor smells a rat. Simon's new classmate Lee Patterson boasts his cool dad works with FBI and even NASA, but actually is an unemployed ex-con and petty marijuana dealer. Lucy regrets taking a school secretary job, is flattered when older hunk Tyler asks her for a dance, but that bubble bursts when he actually wants the password to enter the school computer.

Simon is in absurd trouble just because his mother and the principal make a huge drama of a finger-gesture among schoolboys. Matt tries to explain, but Simon feels he's robbed of another part of his childish innocence. Matt wrestles with domestic problems among his roommates and considers moving back home on account of Eric's cardiac condition. Basketball coach Jason Cleary decides the girls' continuing grades slip warrants drastic action: a team lockout, which makes the local TV news and because of official secrecy starts a rumors circuit.

The whole community is shocked to see Mary and half her Wildcats team meanly vandalized the school's gym. Simon and Ruthie feel guilty for not telling they overheard her planning 'something extreme', so they seek redemption in Catholic confession, a synagogue and a Buddhist temple. Matt feels guilty enough to move back in and resume his task as big brother, only to find that o longer requires his presence and return to his house-mates. Eric calls a marker on lawyer Bill Mays, he gets her in to a trial-avoiding parole office 'last chance' program.